An Open Letter to Irish Air Passengers

Dear fellow Aer Lingus passenger,

If they call Rows 16-29 for boarding and you have a seat in Row 1-15 then get the feck out of the queue! Your ignorance, selfishness and downright ugliness makes a mockery of the system. You have a seat number so why panic by queueing and blocking all us Johnnie Row 27s from boarding? Is it a terriotrial thing? Do you lift up your leg and pee to mark your spot? I hope turbulence spills coffee all over your aran sweater.

The first 15 rows have made a very powerful enemy.

Sincerely,

Simon